Tea Leaf Astrologer
Aquarius (January 20 – February 18)
Say what you will about Aquarians. That they’re headstrong. Paradoxical. Emotionally detached. But if there’s one thing to admire about this enigmatic air sign, it’s that they’re hell-bent on seeking the truth. In other words: You won’t find them drinking the Kool-Aid. This month, cut your favorite water-bearer some slack as they navigate some rather turbulent tides. Give them space. Give them time. They’re sure to come out shining.
Tea leaf “fortunes” for the rest of you:
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
At this point, suffering is a choice.
Aries (March 21 – April 19)
Does the word “squirrel” mean anything to you?
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
With great risk comes, well, you’ll see.
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
Two words: trigger warning.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
No need to intervene. Read that again.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
Yes, it’s shiny. Very shiny. But is it merely a distraction?
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Eat the cake.
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
Ask again later.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
Just walk away. It doesn’t matter what they think.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
Let the candy hearts do the talking.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 19)
Put your phone on silent. It’s time for some “you time.” OH
Zora Stellanova has been divining with tea leaves since Game of Thrones’ Starbucks cup mishap of 2019. While she’s not exactly a medium, she’s far from average. She lives in the N.C. foothills with her Sphynx cat, Lyla.